The Perfect Mother's Day Gift (buy one for your mom NOW)

*THIS POST IS FOR YOU, DEAREST MUMSY*

Unsure about what to do for your dear mother this Mother's Day? Do yourself and her a favor and buy her an Erma Bombeck book. Any Erma Bombeck book. I virtually (virtual/internet promises being negotiable) guarantee she will thank you.

If you're a woman who has never read Erma, go to the bookstore or library now. She's a genius who will break your funny bone and tickle your heart and make you say, "Oh my goodness, this woman is writing about my life!" at least once. And my mom loves her, so there's another fabulous reason!

Who is she?
Erma Bombeck (1927-1996) was an American humorist and newspaper columnist who wrote about marriage, motherhood, and suburban home life. She published 15 books, most of which went on to become bestsellers. And if you love to write humor, then check out the annual Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop in Dayton, Ohio. 

Here are a few of her classics:

The Grass is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank

If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?

When You Look Like Your Passport Photo, It's Time To Go Home

All I Know About Animal Behavior I Learned in Loehmann's Dressing Room

Aunt Erma's Cope Book: How To Get from Monday to Friday in 12 Days

and of course,

Why God Created Mothers

I'll leave you this Mother's Day weekend with a whole bunch of Erma quotes. Feel free to read them all or just skim J

All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with white carpet is one of them.

Spend at least one Mother's Day with your respective mothers before you decide on marriage. If a man gives his mother a gift certificate for a flu shot, dump him. 

I have never gone to the bathroom in my life that a small voice on the other side of the door hasn't whined, "Are you saving the bananas for anything?"


People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.

Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you.


Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but mothers seem to have a market on the supply. "Do you want a spanking or do you want to go to bed?" Don't you want to save some of the pizza for your brother?"

Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.

Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After twenty-two years of child-rearing, they are unemployed.

Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen? Three. It takes one to say, "What light?" and two more to say, "I didn't turn it on."

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.

Mothers have to remember what food each child likes or dislikes, which one is allergic to penicillin and hamster fur, who gets carsick and who isn't kidding when he stands outside the bathroom door and tells you what's going to happen if he doesn't get in right away. It's tough. If they all have the same hair color they tend to run together. 

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.

Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.

Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip. 

 Happy Mother's Day!

From Rejection-land to Pulitzer Nomination with James Lee Burke (and a book winner!)

Need a little inspiration and motivation to keep going on your writing journey?

Photo courtesy of http://www.jamesleeburke.com/

My dad (who's been sending me author tidbits and nibbles ever since he found out I had the writing bug) recently sent me a photo of a book he was reading. Specifically, the bio section of the book. The author was James Lee Burke and dear old dad was fascinated to read that a story that had gotten rejected 111 times went on to be nominated for a Pulitzer Prize. See the bio excerpt below:

Burke's work has been awarded an Edgar twice for Best Crime Novel of the Year. He has also been a recipient of a Breadloaf and Guggenheim Fellowship and an NEA grant. Two of his novels, Heaven's Prisoners and Two For Texas, have been made into motion pictures. His short stories have been published in The Atlantic Monthly, New Stories from the South, Best American Short Stories, Antioch Review, Southern Review, and The Kenyon Review. His novel The Lost Get-Back Boogie was rejected 111 times over a period of nine years, and upon publication by Louisiana State University press was nominated for a Pulitzer Prize.

If you're getting discouraged after rejection number 10 or 20...or 50 or 60...or 100 or 110, DON'T LOSE HEART! I'm not saying that we all have Pulitzer-worthy tales floating around our heads, and sometimes it's best to let a story go and start on something new, but if you love writing, then stick with it J

~~~

By order of Random.org, the WINNER OF CHRIS HOWARD'S NOVEL ROOTLESS IS...

Pk Hrezo!!! Congratulations!! Please shoot me an email with your address and I'll ship you the 

book

Author Chris Howard On Being 6 Months Post Publication with ROOTLESS (and a Giveaway!)

A big welcome to the wonderful Chris Howard, author of the YA novel ROOTLESS. Chris probably doesn't remember this, but I sat next to him during a meal at my very first writing conference in 2010. I was too nervous to even tell anyone at the table about the manuscript I'd written. I still remember Chris turning to me and saying, "You're gonna have to work on that, you know." It was good advice :)

Last Fall, I saw him at a Maggie Stiefvater/Brenna Yovanoff book signing and was thrilled to hear that his own book was about to come into the world. Today he's been kind enough to answer a few questions about life post-publication.

If you haven't read the book yet, I'm giving away a copy to one lucky person who leaves a comment on today's post (winner to be announced next Friday). From his Starred Review by Publisher's Weekly:

In an impressive debut, first in a planned series, Howard introduces a devastated future devoid of trees, where omnivorous locusts plague the landscape, a ruined climate makes survival difficult, and genetically engineered corn is the only viable crop. Banyan, a teenage artist searching for his missing father, builds trees out of scrap for those aching for a touch of the past. When Banyan stumbles across a map to the rumored last trees on Earth, he and an unlikely group of allies are sucked into a perilous adventure, braving cannibals, poachers, pirates, slavers, and the omnipresent and insidious GenTech corporation.

Chris editing in his "creation station." Photo via his website

Congratulation on your success! I loved Rootless and can’t wait for the next book.

Thanks! I’m so glad you enjoyed it.

How has your life changed (and/or stayed the same) as a mega-awesome YA author?

The biggest thing that’s different is that some of my creative work is now out there for people to connect with. That’s a crazy feeling and it took some getting used to. People reach out with all sorts of thoughts and questions and that’s really rewarding but I find I have to isolate myself from it as I work on new things.

You’ve been on the go, promoting Rootless both individually and as part of a panel. Are you still excited to do promotional events and is it easier to keep your energy up when you’re part of a group?

Yeah – I love doing anything that involves interacting with people. I’ve had fun with all the events I’ve done, and I definitely love group events or panels because you get to interact with other authors and bounce things around. I also always try to involve the people in attendance as much as possible, so that it’s a conversation between us.

What have been your favorite promotional events to lead/attend for Rootless?

The book launch at the Tattered Cover was a real highlight because it was such a celebration and so many people I love were there It’s such a special bookstore and we had interactive art installations… a live DJ… people in costume… and GenTech-free popcorn, too J  I’ve also really enjoyed all the school and library visits I’ve done. Getting to talk about the creative process with writers, especially teens, has been so rewarding.

Can you regale us with a brief description of your favorite fan encounter?

Well, it’s been amazing how young some of the readers have been who’ve reached out. I think of the book as a bit dark or mature for most ten or eleven year olds but I’ve gotten emails and letters from kids that age saying ROOTLESS changed their life. There’s no greater feedback than that. And meeting those kids in person has been brilliant.

Who are a few authors you've met and connected with since your book's release?

That’s been a really fun part of the journey. Jenny Goebel is a local author who has her debut coming out this Fall and we share an editor at Scholastic so it was awesome to connect with her. And I’ve really enjoyed meeting other local authors such as Donna Cooner, Emily Hainsworth and Brenna Yovanoff. I met Maggie Stiefvater when she was in town, which was great. And when I was in SoCal last month I got to meet a whole load of wonderful authors—Lish McBride, Jennifer Bosworth, Gretchen McNeil, Shannon Messenger, Debra Driza, Cat Patrick, Kasie West, Sherri Smith, Sean Beaudoin, Robin Benway, Martha Brockenbrough, Cecil Castellucci, Rachel Cohn, Kevin Emerson, Robin Mellom, Gabrielle Zevin, Elise Allen and Carrie Arcos. These people were all SO FUN… I had a blast. Shannon Messenger introduced me to most of them and I can’t tell you how cool she is. I also want to mention my two brilliant online author mates, who I hope to meet in person someday soon… MG Buehrlen and CJ Redwine. I love those two to pieces J 

My stepdaughter is heading to Colorado State University in the Fall, where you went to college. Do you think you’ll ever plant permanent roots here in Colorado? This is a selfish question, since I’d like to attend book signings of your future novels.

My wife and I love it here in Colorado and have so many good friends… so yeah, we are rooted down. I even get to live next door to one of my best mates at the moment. And I’m sure your stepdaughter will love CSU. Go RAMS!

(Final question asked in super-serious Barbara Walters/Oprah interview voice) If you could be a tree, what kind of tree would you be and why?

I’m going to go with Ponderosa Pine. I love the elevation they grow at and the way their bark smells would be a real bonus.

*Jess note: Yes, Ponderosa Pines smell fabulous!*

Thanks so much to Chris~ check out the links below for more information about this super-talented author! 

LEAVE A COMMENT TO BE ENTERED IN THE ROOTLESS GIVEAWAY!!

Author of ROOTLESS (Scholastic Press, OUT NOW)

http://chrishowardbooks.com/
http://www.facebook.com/ChrisHowardBooks
http://twitter.com/chrisH0WARD
http://www.goodreads.com/chrishoward

Into the Hobbit Hole...

I am burrowing into my hobbit hole for a few weeks of revision. And by "hobbit hole," I mean my couch and/or local coffee shop. Because, big shocker, I don't actually live in a hobbit hole.

BUT, BUT, BUT

if you would like a real hobbit hole to turn into a backyard writing office, purchasing one is not out of the realm of possibility! Check out this sweet design that you can buy:

 Not a bad place to get the creative juices flowing, eh? You can see this design and more at Wooden-Wonders.com 

*Dear Husband: If you are reading this blog (I know, I know, not likely), when we move to a place with a larger backyard, please buy me one of these for my birthday. I want a hobbit hole writing office. Seriously. I'm not kidding at all.*


When I return, I get to interview the amazing Chris Howard, author of Rootless! 

He will be six months post-publication and has had plenty of literary adventures to chat about. I'll be giving away a copy of his book as well, so be sure to tune back in on April 26 for a chance to win a fabulous read!

Children’s Books, Food Network Style

It’s no secret that I love The Food Network~ it’s right over there on my Blogger profile bio. I love it so much that I *nearly* wrote a letter to the network a few years ago, detailing why they should come up with a children’s cartoon called “The Little Chefs.”

*aka, did some thinking about it while looking at Mario Batali marinara sauce and having my little daughter tug on my legs at the grocery store*

That’s right, I wanted them to create a tv show with a 6-year-old Emeril Lagasse, Paula Deen, Guy Fieri, Sunny Anderson, Bobby Flay, Giada De Laurentiis, Mario Batali, and especially a 6-year-old Alton Brown. 

How adorable would that show be???  Little Iron Chef Masaharu Morimoto getting into a playground fight with Little Robert Irvine.

Little Paula Deen getting upset with Little Bobby Flay for setting up a rival lemonade/fried chicken stand?

It still makes me happy just to think about that imaginary show.

Sadly, as far as I know (PLEASE correct me if I’m wrong), a cartoon version of Food Network chefs isn’t coming to your television anytime soon, BUT something even better is:

A CHILDREN'S BOOK SERIES BY GIADA!!

According to GalleyCat:

Food Network star and cookbook author Giada De Laurentiis has inked a deal with to publish a children’s book series.

The series … is aimed at readers ages 7-10 and follows brother and sister Alfie and Emilia as they are transported to famous food cities around the world, where they learn first-hand how food cannot only take you places but can also bring you back home.

LINK TO ARTICLE

Agent Advice from Twitter (and an internship announcement and a book winner!)

INTERNSHIP AVAILABLE!

Earlier this week, agent Carly Watters announced that P.S. Literary is accepting applications for two internships: Digital & Social Media Intern and Editorial Intern. Read her post HERE

BOOK WINNER

Random.org has spoken and the winner of Linda Urban's The Center of Everything (see my post/interview with Linda HERE) is...Kirsten Lopresti! Kirsten, please shoot me an email with your address and I'll get that shipped to you.

#askagent

Every once in awhile an agent takes to Twitter to answer questions about publishing. This past Sunday, agent  Jennifer Laughran (Andrea Brown Literary Agency) was nice enough to do just that. You can follow her at @literaticat. Here are some of the questions/answers from the session:

QUESTION: #askagent I see in the AR book finder that they use "LG" for lower grade. Can I query with this or should I say young MG or chapter book?

ANSWER: yes, I'd say chapter book/ young mg. "lower grade" is AR specific methinks, never heard a publishing person use it. #askagent

QUESTION: If an author has Self-pubbed on a small scale, does that affect your consideration of them for future MSs? Thoughts? #askagent

ANSWER: nah, just as long this is a fresh ms. #askagent

QUESTION: do publishers favor agents who are in NY, who they have a relationship with? #askagent

ANSWER: Relationships matter... BUT, some of the best agents in the country don't live in NY. #askagent

QUESTION: once a book gets bought by a publisher, what is the turn around time for print? #askagent

ANSWER: usually one to two years. Unless it is illustrated... Then longer.

QUESTION: does age matter? Would you offer rep to a college student if you had complete confidence in his/her work? Thnks!

ANSWER: sure... college students are adults. Why not. #askagent

QUESTION: real q: when did you know you wanted to be an agent?

ANSWER: when I met an agent and realized what they do. Which is a extension of what I already did, but moreso. :-)

QUESTION: what do you think of the digital only imprints like hydra? #askagent

ANSWER:  I'm interested in imprints that PAY and ARE FAIR TO authors. So. #askagent

QUESTION: What do you think will be the biggest change/shift in the next 5 years in publishing & book selling/consumption? #askagent

ANSWER: That's a thinky question! I think in many ways business has never been better... so. I'm not doom-and-gloomy. :-) #askagent

QUESTION: I'm writing a YA ms in diary form. Some entries r short. What's the preferred format when submitting 2 an agent? Page breaks? Thx! #askagent

ANSWER: presumably you'll have some indications of a new entry -- dates, or asterisks or something? Don't sweat it. #askagent

QUESTION: How does an author's website or social media presence affect your interest in a manuscript? #askagent Thanks!

ANSWER: I'd rather have a kickass book and an author with no social media presence, than a so-so book/great presence. #askagent

Deadly Kisses by Kerri Cuevas- Blog Tour!

Today we are celebrating fellow blogger and writer Kerri Cuevas! She's stopped by the blog to tell us about her book Deadly Kisses, and to tell us about her journey to publication. *Don't forget to enter Kerri's Rafflecopter giveaway at the bottom of the post*

BOOK SUMMARY:

Aiden Grant is seventeen, has a killer kiss, and a boss who used to be President, back in the old days. You see, Aiden is a grim reaper and his kiss welcomes the newly dead. But Aiden’s pleasant grim reaper lifestyle is in jeopardy. And it’s not only because Honest Abe keeps throwing out history lessons with reaping assignments, just to confuse him. It’s because Aiden’s next assignment is to reap the soul of Bee, the only girl he has ever loved.

When Aiden’s kiss of death fails, intertwining their souls, Bee is still very much alive and they are both in trouble. The ancients want Bee, who has special powers of her own, and they’ll do anything to get her.

Some rules are meant to be broken—even if that means Aiden must bargain with his own soul to save Bee. Who knew the afterlife could get so complicated?

TAKE IT AWAY, KERRI!

Thanks for having me today, Jess. Your blog is awesome, and it’s an honor to be here to tell you about my journey to publication.

An author’s journey to publication is as unique as the stories they tell. Mine began a couple of years ago when I wrote my first story, and queried it. Agents were kinder than they should’ve been. When the requests didn’t come rolling in, I changed my strategy. I wasn’t ready to query, and my writing needed to improve. So, I read…like tons. I studied, and made a list of what made a story good. And then I wrote…and wrote…and wrote.

I educated myself. The blogging community was my biggest resource. I learned from other writers on how to write better, and what works and doesn’t work. Things began to click, and my writing improved. All of you out there had a part to play in me learning the craft, and navigating the publishing world. So, my deepest thanks to each and every one of you.

After I learned everything I could, I wrote a story using my new skills. I had excellent critique partners to help make my story better. I queried again. During this time, I saw a submission contest on a blog for WiDo Publishing. They were offering editorial advice, and someone was guaranteed a contract. All I hoped to get was their editorial advice. Never in my wildest dreams did I expect my story to end up in the top three. 

Although I didn’t get a contract the first time, I was invited to resubmit, which I did.

One day, while I was not so patiently waiting for a reply, I was shopping for tools at Sears with my hubby. The store was quiet, except for the chatter of the sales clerk with my hubby talking about tools. My phone beeped with an email alert. I opened the email, read it, and screeched with excitement that I got offered a contract. I loved everything about WiDo, so of course I accepted.

So, never give up on your dreams! Remember opportunities come when you least expect it, so keep your eyes open, but don’t forget to blink and enjoy the journey.

If anyone has any questions for me, I’ll be popping in all day today to answer them.

AUTHOR BIO:

Kerri Cuevas was born and raised in Rhode Island. She moved to New Hampshire with her husband, three kids, cats and a rabbit named Hercules in 2005. When she's not writing, she's chasing chickens on her small farm or searching for the ultimate mac-a-cheese recipe.

Kerri went to college for Early Childhood Education but now writes books for young adults full-time. Her storytelling stems from watching too many horror flicks as a teen, but she no longer needs to sleep with the lights on.

Links:

Kerri's website 

Kerri's Blog 

Goodreads 

Amazon

a Rafflecopter giveaway